I'm young. 18 years old to be exact, but my heart and mind say otherwise.
At a younger age I was never able to understand most things that were brought upon my life. I was constantly facing new struggles that kids I was surrounded by weren’t dealing with and may never have to. I grew up surrounded by medical terms, doctors, and hospitalizations. I became familiar with medication lists so long that they consumed 3 full pages.
My whole life I have been raised through challenges, broken dreams, and learning to adapt to new lifestyles time and time again. As I began to get older and wiser I learned to accept my fate in life, I learned to face difficulties with nothing but a positive outlook, and I learned that there is no way to change your past, but there are ways to make your present and future worthwhile.
There have been times where I was not able to keep my vigorous frame of mind. In these moments I would feel myself slowly drowning in sorrow, defeat, but most of all, guilt. I felt guilty because, even though I may not have been in the best situation, I was far better off than some people in this world. These are the moments that have helped define who I am. People will hear my infectious laugh during my most difficult intervals, I will have an everlasting smile on my face when all I want to do is break down, and no matter what is going on in my life, I am always putting forth the effort into making others happy.
For me to be able to say that I am satisfied with myself, life, and all of its entities is a wondrous feeling and gift. Every day I fight the odds and live with a mad, passionate determination, which no matter what, will never be destroyed.
I’m young. 18 years old to be exact, but my heart and mind say otherwise.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Sleep, here I come!

So incredibly tired. That's all I could think about all day. My eyes were constantly burning and craving sleep. I had a fever on and off. It was only a low-grade one, but it was still making me feel like a complete mess all over. I guess waking up to a better morning didn't really work out, eh? I went to Wal*Mart earlier and actually almost started crying because of how difficult it was to walk around. My whole body ached, my lungs were working harder and harder with every step I took.
I had an appointment with my doctor who prescribes my "happy pills." I have actually been feeling pretty good in that department. At my last appointment we changed my dose and made it higher because it did not seem to be helping at all, but luckily I have been seeing a difference now. My dosage stayed the same and if all goes well, I don't have to go back for another three months. :) Yay for good news!
I'm laying in my bed right now fighting the urge to keep my eyes open.
Well, I just have to keep pushing through and maybe, HOPEFULLY, I can kick this out of the way without needing antibiotics. We'll see.
I shall leave you with some pictures I took today. In the last two I was outside.
Till next time,
Miss Alexandria





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